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Mean/Funny Quotes

• Don't change I want to forget you just the way you are.
  
  
• Next MOOD swing...... 2 seconds.
  
  
• Since you're walkin in my direction I guess I'll walk the opposite way.
  
  
• You ask if u can walk me home. No, you can walk to your home.
  
  
• It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
  
  
• What did u do? Fall down the ugly tree and hit every branch??
  
  
• When I'm in ma car...I don't break for preps, I SPEED UP!
  
  
• See my halo bright and shiny, mess with me and I'll kick your hiney.
  
  
• Roses are red
  Violets are blue
  God made me pretty
  What happened to you?
  
  
• You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.
  
  
• Don't play stupid with me... I'm better at it!
  
  
• If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to b**** in less than 2.1 seconds.
  
  
• No one is normal. There are just a lot of weird people with things in common.
  
  
• I can't wait to be married. It's going to be so great to find that one special person I want to annoy for the rest of my life.
  
  
• I am NOT suffering from insanity... I happen to be enjoying myself!
  
  
• It's alright to let yourself go, as long as you can bring yourself back.
  
  
• God made elks, God made deers, God made *NSYNC a bunch of QU**RS.
  
  
• Who let the dogs out?? WHO WHO WHO WHO? Who let the dogs out WHO WHO WHO WHO WHO??!?!?!
  Please e-mail me if u have the answer, my dogs have been missing all day!
  
  
• God created men first, cause you always make a rough draft before a masterpiece!
  
  
• All good girls and boys go to Heaven - that's why I wasn't invited.
  
  
• If u need space join NASA baby!!!
  
  
• Girls are like phones, we like to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
  
  
• If you're nice, you can call me sweetie. If you're sweet you can call me honey. If you're hot you can call me tonight!
  
  
• Everyone's entitled to be stupid but you are just abusing the privilege.
  
  
• Do I look like a grocery item to you?? I see you checking me out!
  
  
• It's not the size of the dog, It's the size of the fight in the dog!
  
  
• Last night I was looking at the stars and I was wondering where the heck is my ceiling!
  
  
• 4 out of 5 voices in my head say go back to sleep.
  
  
• Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
  
  
• I'm not a blonde!! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot!
  
  
• I smile because I have no idea what's going on.
  
  
• The closest thing you will ever come to a brain storm is a light drizzle.
  
  
• I'm not weird! I'm gifted.
  
  
• You just lost the chance you never had!
  
  
• I'll try anything once, twice if I like it
  
  
• What you see is what you don't get so - drool on - dream on - MOVE ON!
  
  
• You're only bad if you're caught... So that makes me a good girl, RIGHT!?
  
  
• The next time you think you're perfect, try walking on water.
  
  
• What a shame...looks like the ugly fairy kissed you on both cheeks!
  
  
• What's your fairy godmother..a horse?!
  
  
• Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift, that is why we call it the present!
  
  
• I ran into my ex the other day....put in reverse, AND HIT HIM AGAIN!
  

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